You are a kid, running around the fields with wide open eyes, letting all the lights and colours and happiness to pour in through those windows to your soul, enriching it, making it fuller. People are simple, they look at you and smile, almost all of them do, unless they themselves are far beyond redemption. No one lies to you, at-least not directly. Everybody likes you and wants to play with you.Life is good.
You slowly start to grow up. You enter the school system, meet and make friends there. Most of them are starting off with as simple and honest hearts as yours. They share their breakfasts with you, play and stick by you as much as they can. Junior school still has a certain glow in form of that ignorance and innocence burrowing through from much earlier childhood , still not tarred with the things yet to come.
You move to high school, you start seeing people around you change. By the time they start growing hair on their faces, you observe them caring less about things they earlier seemed to care about . From honesty to true friendship to reciprocity in relations, all of these things start to turn and twist and take malevolent forms(at-least in your eyes) and you are looked down upon and laughed on, for still believing in things that you do, and are labelled ‘naive’ and ‘a loser’ for trying to stick by whatever was pure and genuine in you.
But the fact is that all this while, for all the time you have been trying to remain pure, those same vices you despise around you, sneaks in your subconscious through the backdoor, making their way in and laying dormant there. The more you hate it outside and see it in other people, the stronger it grows inside you, taking control of who you are. It grasps and squeezes out the life from whatever that you might’ve wanted to protect, that thing for which you started all this charade in the first place. And then at one point that which you are keeping inside, the low flame, engulfed in all the darkness that has grown around it which you yourself have facilitated, extinguishes, and that’s it. At that point the devil enters your soul. Despair and fear enters too, which soon transform into panic and insanity . Most of the times it is misdirected and misguided and generally comes out in form of disillusionment, insomnia and irrational and impromptu rage. But then one of these days, or rather nights, because its midnight and you lie twisting and turning in your bed, unable to sleep, you see an angry mob chanting and marching through, outside your home, with pitchforks and burning torches. You jump out of your bed and ask one person in the mob where they are headed. He questions back in amazement, “Don’t you know.. ? that witch who lives down the street, it’s all her fault, why we are so lost and why our town is in such misery.”
The smoke emanating from the place where your flame once glowed, tries to restrict you, tries to stop you, but how can a burnt out flame lighten better judgement? It doesn’t exist. So you get in the mob, rather gleefully and someone hands you another one of those torches. Your transformation is finally complete. You have reached the end of your road.